CRJ #7

I think that same sex couples should be able to marry. I do not see why it would hurt anyone because there are already same-sex couples around they just may not be married or considered married by many states. If we don’t let these couples get married, they are not going to go away. In fact, I think that the more we prohibit them from getting married, the harder they are going to try to get things to change. The arguments against same sex couples not being able to get married are simply not enough to convince me that it is wrong.
The first thing that I would like to bring up from the article is from the first page. The article states that people who oppose same-sex marriages believe that a child should have two parents, one male and one female. I feel like this is completely irrelevant because there are a huge amount of families that function with only one adult because of divorce or if one of the partners leaves the other. Peter Sprigg states that allowing homosexual adoption would lead to children suffering the negative consequences of growing up without a mother and a father. At least if it were a same-sex couple the child would still have two parents. There are plenty of kids that grow up with only the male or female parent in their lives and turn out just fine. Therefore, I think that this is not a good argument.
The second point that I would like to bring up is about marriage. When Sprigg defines marriage, I think that he eats his own words. He says that marriage is a fundamental human institution that predates law and the constitution. He goes on to say that it is an anthropological and sociological reality, not a legal one and laws are just to recognize marriage. If this is the case, then anyone should be allowed to get married or be considered as married. These same-sex couples are already acting like they are married they are just being denied their right to get married. Sprigg goes on to say that if love and companionship were sufficient to define marriage, then a child and an adult could get married or an adult child and his or her aging parents. I don’t understand how allowing same-sex couples would allow any of these assumptions to also happen. There are already laws about the age of marriage and not being able to marry someone related to you. These restrictions have nothing to do with same-sex marriages and are irrelevant.
Lawrence Kurdek makes a good point when he states that gay and lesbian citizens argue that being deprived of spousal benefits and marriage is unjust because it involves discriminating against a defined class of individuals. I do look at being deprived of their rights as being discriminated against which is not something that we are supposed to promote in this country.
Kurdek’s findings were that there were no evidence that gay partners and lesbian partners were psychologically maladjusted, had high levels of personality traits that predisposed them to relationship problems, they had dysfunctional working models of their relationships, and that they used ineffective strategies to resolve conflict. Therefore, I don’t think that we can assume that same-sex couples have worse relationships or would not be able to take care of children. The only negative are where same-sex couples scored worse than heterosexual parents was the area of social support. These partners received less support for their relationships from family members. This is understandable because our society has made people frown upon same-sex couples. People learn early to not accept same-sex couples which is a shame.
There are several things that we have talked about in this course that can relate to this discussion. There is a strong relationship between feminists and same-sex couples. They are both fighting for equal rights and in most cases receiving bad reputations or images. There is also a huge relation between inequality and same-sex marriages. We have learned a lot about inequality and how people struggle with this issue every day. The truth is lesbians and gays are not being treated equally because they are being discriminated against.
Another major issue that I find relates to this topic is sexism. I think that this relates to this topic because the people who oppose same-sex marriages believe that marriage should consist of a male and a female. We are brought up to think that men should take care of women and women are supposed to do certain things and men are supposed to do certain things. Over time, we have learned that these ideas are wrong and women should be created equal and be given the same opportunities as men. We have begun to realize that women have been oppressed and the attitudes that we teach our children have been somewhat sexist. If we have realized that men and women should be created equal then why aren’t lesbians and gays created equal as well. We should not think of marriage as a man taking care of a woman anymore. We know that single parents can support themselves and their children.
For all of these reasons, I think that same-sex marriages should be legalized. There is no reason why we should deny this right to our citizens. The lesbian and gay communities are not trying to hurt anyone. I believe that they would just like to be equal and receive the same benefits from marriage that everyone else gets.